The Old Man and the Street

2005-4-21

There's Always Room for Jello!

Every week or so, I'll find a pie tin full of corn flakes in one of my garbage cans. I've always just assumed that someone was putting out food for the birds or the squirrels and someone else was disposing of it. Come to think of it, I'm not sure that birds and squirrels like corn flakes.

Last week, however, I found a huge ham bone in a tin tray sitting next to the garbage can, apparently some sort of offering to the carnivorous animals (tigers? vultures? I have no idea.) in the neighborhood. That went into the trash.

While I'm OK with tossing some food out for the squirrels in the morning, and even with keeping a bird feeder full, I'd prefer not to become known as "Caterer to the Rat World."

But this week... ah this week, it got weird.

In the lot of the condos next-door, along our side fence, I found a pie tin of candied walnuts. Not just a few nuts, mind you, this must have been about 2 pounds worth--enough to send our local squirrels clear into a diabetic coma. That was odd, but nowhere near as weird as what was sitting next to it.

Next to the tin of candied walnuts were two Cool Whip containers full of--I kid you not--red Jello. Now, I can understand the Corn Flakes, and even the candied walnuts, but Jello??? What in the heck would inspire you to put a bowl of jello in your backyard???

I... I... I...

...Come to think of it, I really don't want to know.

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